страницы
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16
He straps on the bass, they cheer. He goes 'one, two, three' and the band launches into 'Drive My Car', they cheer. And then they sat down.
My heart sank. To my utter horror, row upon row of Beatles fans, Paul fans, rock fans, are sitting down. Maybe they don't recognise the song? What are you talking about, you madman? Well, maybe they don't drive cars here or something, maybe this offends them.
'Coming Up' comes next. But they're not coming up. They are staying sat and I'm coming down. 'Looking For Changes', 'Jet' both pass. Still they're sat. 'All My Loving' is next; that'll get them. You have to dance to 'All My Loving', you can't not. In Berlin - where we'd started the tour two days before - they went potty over 'All My Loving'; 23,000 people danced to it. Not in Vienna, though. Plenty of clapping and smiling but no get up and let go.
Blast. Paul's sussed it and is getting sarcastic, saying things like 'Welcome to the office outing' and 'I want you to let your hair down - IF you have any' from up on stage. 'Good Rockin" comes. Not tonight, danke.
What in Christ's name is going on! Stamping of feet for 'Hope Of Deliverance' - a monster hit here -but no getting on them. So I grab this local journalist and ask him. What's the matter with these people?
'Oh no', he says, 'zis is alvays the zame. Zis is how they HAVE to behave'. What the hell do you mean by that?
'Oh, it is a zeated concert'. I can bloody well see that. 'Ja, zur people are zeated and they cannot get up because it is zee rule. They never get up, not for no-one. It is zur rule in Austria. Ve are not allowed to get up. Ve hav zur rule. And zur stewards vill not let zero get up. It is zur rule.'
Right. Well Austria's rules just fell apart. A 2000-year-old discipline went straight out the window, luv. Because when Paul hit the opening keys to 'Lady Madonna', Vienna just had ENOUGH of their rules. It was STUFF THE RULES time all round because, as 'Lady Madonna' hit in, the crowd went WHAM. They forgot every rule they'd been taught at school, threw off their tradition and culture and stood on their seats and stamped on them.
The stewards are going mad.
They are having multiple heart failures. Their jaws have dropped, and they're spinning, arms flailing helplessly as thousands of people get out of their seats and rush at the stage. It is chaos. The security are powerless to stop this flood of freedom for fun.
And this journalist who's been giving us the line about 'Rules Are Rules' has gone white. 'Zis is terrible', he says. No mate, zis is more like it. 'Nein, you don't understand, zis is a madhaus. I must tell my newspaper. Zis does not happen here. It is not vot I zaid vould happen. Zis is crazy.'
Yep. Got it in one. Zis is crazy. So here's £10.22, order me up a Scotch and Coke and damn the price because we're coming to break your rules. Every time.
|